When we are dealing with disappointment, we tend to shy away from thinking of anything outside that space. This all generally stems from the fear we will be feeling: a fear of failure, a fear that what went wrong will happen again, a fear of what others might say or think of us, and plenty more. These fears all come from the place where an expectation has not been met and what you had hyped yourself up for is suddenly not going to happen. However, as I have shared in the past weeks, we have to face it and pick ourselves up from that and see what our next step is.
Pillar 4: Taking the Next Step
In my own experience, I learnt that the fear that something will go wrong will always be there. We can put many countermeasures in place, but chances are there that something, even if it’s a tiny glitch, will happen. This is a reality of life, and I think many of us tend to forget it and think if we prepare and prepare, things will be perfect. But unfortunately, that’s not how it goes. Yes, let’s prepare adequately, but do not be found obsessing over the preparations. So how do you take these next steps?
I have had to change plans and go back to the drawing board after my first plan did not go accordingly. This is not easy to do, but it has to be done. It’s then important to realize in this space that you are changing from the original and so now that your expectations are different, the execution is most likely going to be different and other things as well. However, although this may be your plan B, it’s important to put in the same effort and consideration into the planning. Great execution starts with a great plan.
Boldness to Follow Through
Once done, you then need to follow through on each stage of your plan boldly. I say boldly because when we are scared of failing, we tend to hold back in our efforts. It’s almost like you fear putting your best foot forward in case you are disappointed again. But like I said in the previous article, we need to learn to move on from disappointment with hope in new outcomes. Whether it’s a relationship or a new business venture, approach it like it is a new thing altogether.
Sometimes I have seen that the new plan or new outcome is far better than what I had initially set out to achieve. When we feel too let down to carry on, we have to hold on to hope. We have to choose to stand firm in moving forward, sometimes limping from the hurt of these disappointments but moving all the same. They say when life gives you lemons, make lemonade, and that is what we have learnt to do in November. Setbacks and disappointments will come, some just upsetting and inconvenient and some heartbreaking and devastating, but learning to process each disappointment correctly and move on from it is what is crucial.
Until next time, remember: when you change your thinking, you can change your life.
Cynthia M is a mental wellness coach trained in psychology. She works with different individuals and groups to help them establish a more balanced state of emotional well-being so they can experience a better quality of life.
Connect with her on:
Cynthia M is a Mental Wellness Coach trained in Psychology. She works with different
individuals and groups to help them establish a more balanced state of emotional wellbeing so
they can experience a better quality of life.