With Love from a Fellow Endo-Warrior

“Hi Vimbai…I have something short I wrote I would like you to read and consider for your magazine…may I have your email address?’(Mar. 2, 2021)

Coreen Madanha and I attended the same high school. Life took us on different paths, but we reconnected years later. So when I read her WhatsApp message expressing interest in sharing “something short” with TWSC readers, I was glad. It’s always a pleasure getting those types of messages. I assumed Coreen would submit a reflective piece or a word of encouragement to women facing trying times.

The following day, an email notification announced the arrival of her email in my inbox. I began to read and I was blown away almost immediately. Written with such candor and poise, she peeled back the layers of her heart and revealed a hidden sorrow behind her radiant smile. She described debilitating physical pain caused by endometriosis and an emotional burden few were privy to – infertility. 

Her story moved me. I imagined the emotional stamina it must have taken to write her story so courageously and without reserve. With grace, she honoured and embraced each disappointment, each heartache, each tear. She gave voice to her pain, and her story felt like a love letter written to the spaces in her heart that were still in process.

Her strength amazed me as she looked beyond her own pain and encouraged fellow endo-warriors to remember God loves them and sees them. Her story was a much-needed hug from one endo-warrior to another and gave voice to what so many women feel.

Coreen’s story was read by thousands of people and became the second most-read story on The Weight She Carries in 2021! I even received a request from a different publisher to feature Coreen’s story on their site as well.

With March being Endometriosis Awareness Month, I reached out to Coreen to find out how her life has been since opening up about her battle with the disease and how she’s managing the symptoms these days.

When you wrote your story in 2021, was that the first time you were sharing your story publicly?

Yes, that was the very first time I shared my story publicly. At that point, I’d only told my family and a few friends about my condition. So when I shared my story, my extended family, workmates, and church members were all shocked. What’s interesting is that it has been years, but I still hear from people who are just now learning about my story. The awareness continues to spread, and people continue to discover more about the disease and the challenges people with endometriosis face.

So, how are you doing these days health-wise?

So much has improved. Stepping out to talk about it drew so much support and advice from people I didn’t even know. I haven’t gone to the endometriosis specialist to check the current stage of my endometriosis as I am on a pain management path, but the flare-ups and pain have decreased.

I’ve been taking a multivitamin called 50 Plus and Salome from a company in South Africa called 3Sixty Biomedicine. That’s been helpful. I also started taking black cohosh with red clover – it’s an herbal supplement that has been very good for me.

By speaking out, I also got to learn about a menstrual heating pad that provides advanced pain relief. It’s a three-second rapid heating pad and it’s wireless. Many people in-boxed me with different remedies. Some worked, others didn’t.

So, let’s talk about the impact endometriosis had on your life in the past.

I had to find coping mechanisms. I would have headaches that lasted for days but didn’t know that it was endometriosis. My left leg would swell and be sore, and I assumed it was arthritis. I never linked it to endometriosis.

I thought severe cramps before, during, and after ovulation were normal. So, I dismissed them as such. A week before my periods, I would experience excessive back pain, throwing up, and a running tummy all at the same time. I would have flu symptoms and just think my immune system was down. Because these symptoms affected my whole body, I didn’t know that it was endometriosis.

I explained my symptoms away. “The headaches are because I’m not drinking enough water,” I would tell myself. “My leg is swollen and sore because I’m not running enough. This reoccurring flu is because I’m low on Vitamin C. I have diarrhoea because I didn’t wash my hands properly. I’m throwing up because I reacted to this food.” So I would try to cope with the different symptoms in isolation, not knowing that it was all one disease.

What did you discover worked for your body?

• Exercise

Exercise, definitely. It’s at the top of the list. I had to leave home for work at 5:30 am, so I began waking up at 4:30 am to run for at least 30 minutes. My doctor later advised me to walk instead due to sciatic nerve pain and other considerations he shared.

Then I discovered a new love – skipping. My friend introduced me to it and at first, I would struggle with 50 skips. I’m happy to report that I can now do 2,000 skips in 30 minutes, and I’m good to go!

I also took up swimming at one point, but because of work challenges, I dropped it. Now I’ve bought a tennis racket and hope to start tennis lessons soon!

I exercise at least six days a week – Sunday to Friday. Firstly, because it makes me happy. Secondly, it alleviates the cramps, backache, sore legs, and headaches I sometimes feel.

• Nutrition

For 6 months, I was under the care of a nutritionist and medical doctor who observed my body. The nutritionist is a fellow endo-warrior so she was a great fit.

To start, I went on a 10-day detox. I bought dandelion, milk thistle, red clover, black cohosh, hawthorne, and a range of supplements.

After the 10 days, I went on a vegan diet for six months. I eventually added other foods, but I must say that those were the best six months of my life. I’m still reaping the benefits because I used to experience a continuous cycle of pain month-long. From period to period, I was in pain. Now I just have pain two or three days before my menstrual cycle to signal that it’s coming.

Another lifestyle change I made is not eating after 6 pm.  If I must eat, I’ll have a cup of tea and maybe a slice of bread.

My nutritionist taught me to be deliberate about what and when I eat.  I’m a Seventh-day Adventist, so I’ve always known about the Health Message, but I learned to make creative, healthy meals.

I advise women with endometriosis to see a nutritionist along with a doctor. Find out what supplements you should be taking and what diet works for you. In general, avoid red meat. I think every endo-warrior should carefully consider what she puts into her body.

• Water

I have an appreciation for water now. At first, I thought all the water was going to make me sick! My nutritionist confirmed that there is no such thing as a water overdose. I think all the water was cleansing my body of the toxins I had. I don’t think we realize how much toxin we have in our bodies. The colour of your menstrual blood is a good indicator. Mine changed from a deep, deep, almost black colour to a nice, red colour.

What would you say to a fellow endo-warrior who has tried different remedies and is getting discouraged?

• Give it Time

Sometimes the change is about to come but we’re not patient enough. You may be taking a supplement, but ask yourself, ‘Have I taken it for long enough? Yes, I’m doing this exercise regime, but have I given it time to bear fruit?’ As women, we are busy, and we don’t give certain solutions enough time to benefit us. We want a quick fix, and sometimes the body needs time to adjust to the change and respond. I realized that I couldn’t take something for two weeks and give up on it.

• Prioritize Self-care

Take time to prioritize yourself. Be deliberate, be intentional, and document as much as you can to keep track of the changes in your body. We are serious about school. If you’re earning a degree, you want to get a distinction, right? So let’s give self-care the pedestal it deserves. Let’s treat it as a curriculum and ask ourselves, ‘How can I improve my self-care? How much time am I devoting towards self-care?’ Ignoring the needs of your body is a huge disservice to yourself.  

Self-care can be anything – gardening, visiting a friend, watching a series or movie, going out for ice cream – anything that makes you smile and is good for your mental health. Sometimes the medicine we take for endometriosis can leave us depressed. Some have side effects, so we need to do what we can to protect our mental health.

• Practise gratitude

My mom encouraged me to begin writing 10 things I’m grateful for every day. At first, it was hard to even come up with two. I was sick, what was there to be grateful for? But now my list overflows with gratitude to God. There’s so much to be grateful for. Be grateful and enjoy life. This is your life. It is not a rehearsal. We’re not saving anything for the future. It all begins now.